Don't call it a comeback

For those of you who know me and for those that don't, I am a huge fan of the Cyclocross. Love that stuff. It is so much fun to watch. It is fast, and the PRO Elite fields only race for 60min. Full gas. Mud. Sand. Grass. Ice and snow and rain, wind, whatever, you name it they race in it. How can you not love 'cross? This brings me to the point where I actually race 'cross, or I at least enter, pay my money and line up for a race. If you see how fast I go, I would not call it racing. More like surviving. Racing 'cross is like a dare you make with your own body. "I dare you to go as hard as you can without puking." "oh yeah, try me." Why would anyone want to do this? 'Cause it's FUN. Right? Sure.

NO, it hurts like heck. But. We do it anyway.

I have not raced all season, so I decided to race a three day race this last weekend. I am a shell of a human, after. Not being in race-shape and then racing three days in a row is incredibly intelligent. "Race yourself into shape" -add that to the long list of Cyclist Lies. This is the most painful way to gain fitness, maybe. Three days down in the books and I'm shelled, beat, cracked, broken. So, I should enter a 50 mile MTB race. Great idea.

So there is that. I'm headed to Texas to hang out with the family and destroy my body one pedalstroke at a time. To paraphrase Tyler Durden, "we are dying one second at a time" it's how you spend those seconds that matter. I should spend close to 18,000 seconds of my life dying, riding in what I consider one of the most beautiful places (Palo Duro Canyon). What are you going to do for five hours on Saturday? Maybe, just maybe I'll let you know how this goes...

Changing seasons not underwear

It's not even August yet, and I'm already thinking about Fall. This is like living in Utah dreaming of the snows to come when it is ninety degrees out. I'm getting that dirt frame of mind, I've been riding the CX bike a lot and threw a leg over the MTB for the first time in... forever. Just when I'm getting into the swing of things, mother nature throws a wind storm party and there are all these drunk fallen-over trees in my way. You know some of the trees on the trail are like barriers, dismount-jump-remount. Shouldering a 30lb full-suspension doesn't have the same appeal or is as nimble as it's off road cousin.

Le Tour is over and it was the most entertaining boring thing I've ever watched. It was similar to watching a movie that you know the ending to, but think that watching it this time it will change. No such luck. I was really enjoying the race until Froome put a strangle hold on yellow. Boring. Yes, he lost like a min when crosswinds shredded the field, but he took it back and more. Sagan locked up the Green with his points grabbing scheme. Don't feel he is the best sprinter, he is a Classics machine. He can get over the bigger bumps that the other pure sprinters die on, but in a heads up full gas sprint he is good, just not Cavo good.  Kittel, boom! This guy is for real. Impressive wins all 4 of them. Argos, in just three years has produced a Pro ProTour team. Impressed. Quintana was a breath of fresh air, slightly greedy with the jerseys. Hey pal just take one and move on. Oh, you want the White one and the Polka dots? Greedy, should have taken the Yellow while you were at it...

Enough of le Tour for now. Utah is coming up. Get the App and watch the stages on your mobile. It will be the hardest stage race in 'merica. After that we have the Tour of Colora... I mean US Pro Tour Challenge or something like that. It's Colorado. It's in one State, call it what it is. Coors needs to step up and sponsor this thing... Wait a min, we could call it the Coors Classic. Nope, just having a flashback. Sorry. Maybe Red Zinger? Hell of the West?

The days are getting shorter, you probably have not noticed yet, but they are. This means the changing of the seasons and I know you are expecting me to say CycloCross, but not yet. We still have La Vuelta and the Fall Classics, and don't forget Worlds. Lots and lots of racing left on our plates.  There is CrossVegas middle of September in Vegas and the World Champ will be there. (as will I, just not in a professional manner)

More coffee por favor, my body hurts, but I want to ride. Gonna ride down to the local Starbucks and see if I can get them to mainline me some espresso. I hate needles, maybe should drink it. Just French press it into my mouth. (that sounds dirty) Sorry trying to keep it PG-13

ps don't get all used to this

Stuff to read

This is going to be all over the place, and I'm not handing out maps.  So stick with me and we will get lost together.

A happy little story lives here

First off, I would like to give a posthumous Happy Birthday to Bob Ross.  What an awesome afro. There is no debate as to the perfectness of Bob's afro.  Legendary.  Oh yeah, and he had the craziest show on PBS.  "Let's put a happy little cloud over the mountain, where these happy trees live..."  Bob would be on my short list of people I want to party with, if he were still around making "pretty little rivers where happy fish  live."  I always wondered, laying on the couch, if there was at least one person sitting in front of their easel, in front of their TV painting with Bob?  That would be a show to watch.  Some old dude trying to go brush-stroke for brush-stroke with Bob and getting all frustrated because Bob is super awesome.  The frustration would be hilarious... Somebody work on that, a show where people watch re-runs of Bob and try and paint with him.  It would be primetime.

Doping and the Dopes

I think it is starting to become the "in" thing to do theses days, you know to come out of the "doping closet".  It's getting so bad that everyone is saying that they cheated in some way or another.  I'm just waiting for someone to come out and say they used a time machine to win.  "When I perfected time travel, I no longer needed to work on form or stay in shape..." "It was easy to win even when I smoked heavily and was drunk most of the time."  Now that is a story, please please please let me be the one to break it to the world.  It is almost to the point that guys need to come forward (all ten of them) and come clean about being clean.  "Yes, I am ashamed to say... I raced clean."  I mean really, who of who did not do something in the "grey area" to enhance their performance?  That is what I want to know.

More on Doping.... moron doping  -see what I did there?

Rabobank announced it will cease sponsorship of cycling.  What a sad day.  One of the longest and largest supporters of cycling, from the cycling mad Dutch, are turning their back on cycling when it needs it most.  Sponsorship of sports in general is crazy if they think they are putting their money into a "clean" sport.  There is not a sport on this planet that can claim it is clean.  The human condition requires that winning at all cost is the name of the game.  Cheating is and always will be an underlying factor, as long as humans are involved.  End of story.

The Good

Cyclocross is alive and kicking.  The World is coming to the U.S. in Feb.  Real CX.  The World's best will be jumping barriers, navigating sandpits, and slogging it up in the mud.  Right here.  Here in America.  How cool is that?  I tentatively have a date to see the "greats" of this sport.  I am super excited to witness the speed, the grace, and the brutality that is Cyclocross, live and in person.  More to come on that.  Fingers crossed.

over n out, good buddy, keep the rubber side down.

Missed you...

Rumors to my demise are greatly exaggerated... or something like that.  I know it's been awhile, but I have excuses.  Like, my dog ate my netbook, I have been on a mental vacation, I don't have anything to write about.  Yeah, I know.  Lame.  Doping doping doping.  If I could dope to make me a better writer, oh heck yes I would.  Cheat to win baby.  That's the 'merican way.  Tired?  There's a pill for that.  Fat?  There's a pill for that.  Sad?  There's a pill for that.  Slow?  There's a pill for that.  Soft?  There is even a pill for that.

I'm doping pretty hard this morning, I'm like on my 4th cup of coffee and it is not helping my ability to tap-a-tap-a on the keyboard.  I recently attended a Wednesday Night Ride afterparty and some friends mentioned the fact that my blogging had been lacking.  So, push comes to shove and now I am writing just to write.  So bear with me, I'm am trying to get back into "writing shape".  You gotta walk before you can run.

So, I've been working at the shop, riding my bikes and have been dabbling in some Cyclo-Cross.  Yes, it is CX season and we are elbow deep.  I have a love/hate relationship with Cross.  I love Cross.  I hate how I feel one lap into a race, the feeling that the body is failing one system at a time.  Muscles refusing to work, lungs trying to escape the chest.  My mind slowing down time so that the seconds turn into mins and 45 of them feels like a life sentence in a burning building.  This is Cross.  The dark side, the dirty little secret that is not really a secret at all.

So you ask why do you love Cross?  It's beautiful in a hard dirty way.  You take what is essentially a road bike and race it off road in the worst of conditions.  It is a test of man and machine that pushes the limits of both to the point of failure.  Not only does one need spare wheels, but it is standard operating procedure to have a spare bike in the pits.  I love the harshness of the sport, how refreshing it is to be cold, filthy, and filled with pain.  It is not easy.

This has been painful -not in a good way, but I hope it will lead to more words floating through the cloud to you.  So see you next time and maybe it won't be three months from now...

Thank you sir, may I have...

The blast furnace that we call Summer is dying down.  This can only mean one thing.  Well actually more than one, but let's face it... I like the dramatic.  Cycling.  You say, "but we haven't stopped cycling".  Exactly.   I'm talking about more cycling, cycling that involves dirt.  It is CX season.  Time to air up the knobbies and head to the parks to run and jump over stuff.  I've been riding the CX bike a lot lately, and I'm loving it.  "If you have the means, I highly recommend you get one."  -That is a Ferris Bueller quote.

I love the mindset that the CX bike puts me in, it's like a search and destroy riding style.  This bike has a mind of it's own.  Hop curbs, cut through lawns, carve knolls, and well whatever you can handle.  Pavement -yes, Dirt -yes, Snow -yes, Rocks -yes, what else you got?  YES!

If you are reading this and have not witnessed Cyclocross or CX then you need to do some googling.  Get to work!  If riding a CX bike is not for you, then maybe you like to drink beer and swear?  Well then, CX spectating is for you.  One of the best things about CX is heckling.  Heckling? You say?  YES, it's crazy fun and totally acceptable.  Motivation through degradation.  Forget all the positive bull crap that people preach, I'm talking about good old trash talk.  The worse the better.  See where I'm going here?  Oh, man is it fun.  Come out sometime and try it, it is good for the soul.  Get all that negative energy out and hurl it at someone or someone(s).  It helps you and it helps the CX racer.  True story.

Let's face it, people who race Cross are not right in the head.  Take a perfectly good road bike and "modify" it to ride it off road -that's what mountain bikes are for, Right?  Now let's find the worst conditions to ride in, add in some sand, barriers, gravel, roots, grass, dirt, mud, and just about anything you can think of -now you have CX.  Heck yeah, people!  They deserve to be verbally ridiculed on a lap by lap basis.  Ah, Cross how we love the.

I can't wait to feel the burn of embro on the skin, cold air piercing my lungs, and frozen appendages.  I long for the feeling of sand turning my bike into a slithering snake.  The feel of rims bottoming out on rocks and roots.  The pure satisfaction of just finishing is sometimes greater than the joy of winning.  (paraphrased from Pete Smith of MadAlchemy)

"Real" road riding

On my recent trip back to Texas to see my parents, and get some bike riding done.  I took the CX bike to take advantage of all the dirt road mileage that is available right out my parent's front door.  I was blessed with slightly damp to muddy conditions the first day.  This is a gauntlet thrown down my Mother Nature that could not be refused.  My Dad decided to load up his two dogs and be a follow vehicle.  He is an excellent moto-pacer, but today's course did not allow for speeding inches behind a farm truck.  Maybe next time.  We headed out on roads that I have driven tractors, combines, grain-trucks, cars, farm trucks, but never a bike.  This was a new and interesting way to see the country that I knew, or did I know?  Riding a bike is one of the most intimate ways to see country, and I was now seeing my home with new eyes.

Texas dirt roads, flat, straight, abundant

Old farmhouse owned by cousins

Farm Schoolhouse in the middle of nowhere

Me with a Texas "tree" in background

Dirt roads rock

My Team Car Truck

End of the beginning

Today was the Oklahoma State CX Championships.  I raced.  One, because I like to race.  Two, because it was on my home turf.  I watched the CX Champs last year from the other side of the tape.  It was cold and I had a blast watching, but I also felt drawn to this fantastic thing that we call Cyclo-cross.  It is not right taking a road bike and racing it off-road.  That is what mountain bikes are for, off-road.  Everything about CX is like a dare.  It is done off road, in horrible conditions, with an every-man-for-himself approach to racing, and this all happens at what we like to call "full-gas".

My first experience with racing the CX bike came at a practice race.  It hurt like nothing I had experienced in quite a while.  Something along the lines of riding a trainer and doing 40min super-high intensity, except this trainer was bumpy, dusty, hot and had riders in front and behind.  I questioned why I had to have a CX bike?  I did two more practice races and then drove to OKC with some friends for my first "real" race.  I made it a lap and almost a half when I had a flat.  Not the best start.  And that lap and a half hurt, it hurt a lot.  I was kind of glad that I got the flat and did not have to continue to suffer.  Yeah, don't tell anybody that, I have a rep to maintain.  Once again I questioned the validity of owning a CX bike.

I did some practice riding of my own on Turkey Mountain.  I had a blast rocking the CX bike on mtb trails.  I took the rig to Texas with me and rode it from my parents house down to the Canyon.  This was so much fun.  During the ride down to the Canyon, I watched all the cars with their mtbs on racks headed to the same trails that I was going.  I actually was stopped in the Canyon by a couple that asked if I was "that guy riding the road down here?"  Yep, that was me.  Owning a CX bike was starting to be kinda cool.

More practicing, some racing and more rides.  I bought a helmet light to ride now that the sun is nowhere to be found after 5:00, and the first usage came in the rain one night and I reached for the CX.  This was fun, and I was starting to realize more and more what owning a CX bike meant to me.  It became the Swiss Army knife hanging in the garage, appropriately between the MTB and the Road Bike.  This is the bike that begs to be ridden in the mud, rocks, grass, sand, fire, brick-walls, German razor wire, snow, bullets, and pave. 

Today was the last CX race that I will do this season, but I do hope that it is not my last CX race.  I have struggled with the question of, "is racing Cross fun?"  I am not sure I can answer that.  What I can say is that it hurts.  I have grown to love riding my CX bike anywhere and everywhere.  Heck if this were easy, everyone would do it, and I probably would not want to do it anymore.

Day Uno

Ok, I know that now I am temporarily unemployed that I need to write more.  I know this, so stop complaining about "I don't have anything to read on the toilet" "why don't you have a new post?".  I'm not saying it's going to be good, but at least I will provide you with a small distraction for your day.  You are welcome.  Not thanks necessary, just tell your friends how awesome it is to read, and they will tell their friends and then I will have four people reading this blog.  Livin' the High Life, or just drinking it.

*Not a Race Recap*
I donated some money to suffer in the cold, which turned out to not be that cold, and participated in a timed group ride.  It was good to get out and ride with friends that I have not seen in a while.  Good times, as the kids say.  I was hoping for some CX weather, which means mud and crud.  Saturday would have been nice and sloppy and a little warmer, but Sunday was almost perfect temps for a CX race.  It is amazing how fast you forget how bad it feels to run the engine in the red for 40mins.  I had my memory fade and decided to register for the 4 and the 3/4.  Needless to say that after the 4, I decided that drinking beer was a better option than "riding" another race.  20lbs gets really heavy after a few laps, and the barriers seem to grow out of the ground.

I am recovering quite nicely with my coffee and thinking of all the tasty treats that I can make for breakfast.  Waffles?  Omelette?  Oatmeal?  Cereal?  Coffee?  Already working on the coffee, dang how many cups was that?  There goes my data for my scientific research.  No grant for me.  Maybe tomorrow I will discover the "Too Much" and the precise quantity to reach said limit.  Today will just be a blind dress rehearsal. I should get a lot of cleaning done, and my list of chores will vanish.  ADHD + Caffeine makes for strange bedfellows.  Who wants to go ride bikes?

Check out the What I'm Listening To section of my blog.  I'm hitting up some 80's and 90's today.  The dogs are thrilled that I am a stay at home dad, we are going to hang out and have a good ole time.  Anyway, starting to lose my train of thought, short and sweet.  Enjoy your day, and if you are in the Greater Tulsa Area hit me up if you need someone to go ride with.  Road or MTB or CX, I'm multi-cycle.  As my sister says -Ciao for now.

Adjust this...

Man this day started off like any other day, just like Bill Murray hitting the alarm clock in Groundhog's Day.  Routine is as routine does.  Potty and feed the dogs, make coffee, eat cereal, stretch, make/pack lunch, dress (put clothes on, not wear) head out the door, check -work phone personal phone keys, drive to work.  Etc...  Today was a day that was supposed to be easy and fast, and with my leftover time I would work on Thursday's and Friday's route, you know just to have it done.  BS...I want to leave early on Thursday and Friday.  It was going so well right out of the gate that I thought it was Thursday and I was happy down in my soul and then I realized it was still only Wednesday, but happy it was Wednesday 'cause Wednesday kills compared to Monday. 

'It hit the fan at stop number three today.  Then on the way to my next stop, we will call it stop number four, my work truck died.  Tits up at 65mph on the Creek Turnpike in the left hand lane.  Oops.  Put it in N and tried to restart, nothing.  Checked traffic and signaled to pull off the road, again tried to restart.  Nothing.  Dead.  If it were a horse I would have pulled out my gun and put it out of its misery.  Routine just became a missing person on the 10 o'clock news.

Long story short, Good day became crappy day became #&^%$@^%#$!!!!!!!  I became a clock watcher and began to calculate at what point I would have to quit running route drive back to the shop get my car drive home and still have some daylight left for a ride.  Priorities!  I made it, got into my car and was about six or seven mins into my drive home when to paraphrase Chicken Little the bottom dropped out.  Seriously?  So now it is raining, and my mtb ride is just a work day dream that was being washed into the gutter.  Turn the soul crusher to 11, break out the whine and cheese, I think I'm gonna cry.

Got home.  Was about to put on some Joy Division lay on the couch in the dark and create a black hole of depression the likes of which have not been seen or recorded by man or machine.  I looked at my phone for some reason and saw that it was 65* and raining.  No ____ Sherlock.  Wait a min, 65* is warm.  So if you add rain, 65* is now cool, not cold, but cool.  My work induced rage coma is starting to wear off and I realize that I can ride my bike in the rain, and 65* is well within my manufacturer's tolerances.  Oh, what's that?  I have a CX bike?  A bike that is just begging to be ridden in the harshest of conditions that I am probably not man enough to dish out. 

Quick look at the clock said that I had better hurry if I wanted to be back before the dark had a dual-fisted hold on the earth.  Leg over the saddle, clipped in, drilling it down the block.  Oh crap, might want to let off the gas on this corner with all this liquid on the ground, yeah whetevez... I laugh at the rain, the wet grass, the mud, the leaves on the ground, and all the jealous fools in their metal coffins trying to kill me in a fit of vehicular homicide.  Slow it down there Git-r-done dude.

Hate, Rage, Fury, Anger, Madness flowed in my veins.  With every pedal-stroke they were broken down into the most enjoyable smooth flowing calm.  A calm that can only be gained from the distillation of the negative chased out of the body with the magical powers of the bi-wheeled contraption that we like to call a bike.

Racing 'Cross -fun?

This is not a race report.

Since I built up my frame and turned my first laps at practice I have been undecided about my feelings toward cyclo-cross.  I think it has to do with not having the intensity in my legs that I have in the past, and not being used to the pain and suffering.  As if you ever get used to pain and suffering.  I have a good enough imagination and knack for words that I could probably come up with about 200+ excuses for why I can't, why I don't, or why I'm so freaking slow.  I'm not going to insult your intelligence.

'Cross requires an engine that has to be run in the red all the time.  I do not have that kind of engine.  You know what, I don't really care that much.  This time of year I am in chill mode, which means railing single-track on the mtb and just riding for fun.  Not like I have a training program that I follow, but especially this time of year it is only riding.  Now that I have thrown 'cross into the ring there is this temptation to get all crazy into racing and training.  I don't want to lose sight of what the big picture is, and it is after all...to have fun.

I have great teammates and friends that keep me with my head on straight.  No, they really don't, but what they do...is make sure I am having fun.  That is why we are on a team and that is why we ride bikes together.  Do my teammates care if I win or if I come in last.  Yes, they care that I have a good time.  I like to do good, don't get me wrong I would like to win a race, but winning is not my motivation.  The process is better than the end result.  Riding a bike with friends and teammates is more important than the podium.

Standing on the podium is brief, but the process that gets one to that position is what matters.  My teammate destroyed the field and stood on the top step today.  He deserved it.  I have been struggling with 'cross, and today was no different.  Suffering, pain, and fun.  That's right I had fun today, I lined up dead last 1) because I am learning 2) I wanted to see how many people I could pick off.  In the process I suffered, I felt pain, I had fun, and I got to race with my teammates.  And this folks is what it is all about.

Gettin learned

I'm about knee deep into this craze that we affectionately  call 'Cross Racing.

I raced my first race a few weeks ago and flatted in the middle of the second lap.  With no wheels in the pit I was done for the day.  I am not sure if this was a blessing or just bad luck.  I will say it again, but when you watch something don't ever fool yourself into thinking you can do it.  Oh yeah I can do that... it looks easy.  And, never ever try and use your brain to come to the conclusion that you can do it.  Me talking to my brain:  I can race road bikes, I can ride a mountain bike, and this looks so easy.  Do it man, you will kick @s$!!! Yeah, I will do it, and I will kick @S$!!!  Another thing of note, I usually had a man soda in my hand while watching 'Cross racing, and several others safe inside my belly.  Not a good combo when common sense should be used.

I hate Time Trials, because they are hard and I suck at them, No, really.  I'm the guy at a TT that is there to make the winners times look so good.  'Cross racing is all the pain of a TT, but with the added bonus, or bonuses of having to jump over barriers, mount and dismount a moving bike, sand, mud, rain, grass, gravel, corners, off-camber turns, 180*s, and just basic Pain turned up to 11, because 10 would just be too easy. 

I understand why it is appropriate to heckle at a 'Cross race.  If you have made the wise decision to race 'Cross, you deserve the beratement.  'Cross is not right.  And those of us who have chosen this path are either brilliant or completely deranged.  It is a fine line.

So far I have learned that flat prevention is a must, I will no longer have unprotected tires.  I decided to go super low budget and throw some Stan's in the tubes.  So far so good.  Maybe if I am really good I will get an upgrade for my birthday.  Tubeless.  I will never be sold on tubular, well not until or if someone would like to sponsor me.  If you would like to sponsor me send me an email and shloads of cash or product.

I know now that I just need to get out my Big Chief Tablet and get ready for some school.  I have two #2 pencils sharpened and ready to go.  I just hope some of these lessons are learned from experience gained and not from failure.  Well not too many from failure.

Psycho Cross

So, there is this thing.

I've watched a lot of cross, and it looks like so much fun.  Heckling from the "other" side of the tape is so much fun.  The craziest thing happened... all my friends were getting Cross rigs and gearing up to race Cross this season.  Not to be outdone, and lord let's not forget peer pressure (real or conceived).  I broke down and bought a frame, cannibalized my race bike and now I have a full on CX race machine.  A no excuse race machine.  Yeah!  I'm totally set.

What the ____ was I thinking? Cross is hard. Period. I'm talking kick to the crotch pain. It starts off like it's not gonna hurt, but then it slowly builds into an agonizing body death that can only be cured by a mass quantity of brewed man soda.  Cross is full gas from the hole shot.  The only time you can rest is when you come to the line at the finish or when you spend some time on the ground after a failed dismount over a barrier.

People Pros make things look easier than they are, make sure you know what you are doing before you sink time and money into a soul crushing body destroying good time.  Don't get me wrong, Cross is awesome.  Cross is tough, full on, and it requires time to perfect. 

I'm watching Superprestige Rudervoorde on the interweb right now and it seriously looks like so much fun and they make it look so darn easy.  Like another sport that I used to play, Hockey.  Watching Pros play hockey is so beautiful, graceful, and it looks so easy.  Yeah, now go out and try and ice skate, now try and hockey stop -both sides.  Not so easy is it?  Now try to stick handle, shoot, pass, and try not getting knocked on your backside.  Yet it looks so easy.  Now go ride your bike in the mud. Sand. Grass.  Barriers?  Stairs?  Really?

Now that looks like fun, and it has to be easy right? 

Crossing the tape (no pun intended) from spectator to participant seemed like such an easy thing.  Buy a bike, ride the bike, race the bike.  Oh, no!  Once you commit you are committed...for good or evil. 

I always wondered why Cross racers wore skinsuits?  Answer:  it is the next closest thing to a straight jacket that the cycling world has to offer.

Don't call it a comeback

Writer's block?  I don't think so?  I don't know what my problem is?  Issues?  Issues are supposed to be good fodder for writing, Right?  My issues are unequivocally boring, nothing that would merit prose or lyric.  Oh the days of boy meets girl boy looses girl.  Now, there is a goldmine in that, too bad it was like 20 some odd years ago. 

I have been on the bike, or should I say bikes?  About two weeks ago I dusted off the mtb and put some Stans in the tires to make it road mountain ready.  It is nice to be back out on the dirt, rocks and roots.  Roots, yeah that is where my cycling comes from, the fat side of the family.  Tires that is.  I've been rocking the off-road cycle since 1999, you do the math -I've been drinking.  So, now I find myself coming full-circle or semi-circle and taking the road bike to the dirt.  I've been misquoted as saying that I would never race Cyclocross.  I'm pretty sure that what I was trying to say was that I would never race cyclocross as a Pro.  Just needed to clear that up so as to avoid confusion when you see me struggling to mount and dismount.

Yes, I have a CX frame sitting in the shop waiting for brakes and a bottom bracket, and to be built.  Minor details.  I am going to pretend to race CX this season so that I can add yet another bike to the stable of bikes that I already own.  Pretty sneaky of me don't you think?  Very Very Sneaky. 

You have probably heard of "hold my beer and watch this"?  Well, I am going to race CX with a slightly different mantra... I will proudly be flying the flag of "Hand me a beer and watch this".  That's right anything worth doing, well or not well should involve the consumption of liquid courage.  Being my heritage is of the Germanic nature, I therefore should honor that heritage as best as possible.  I will be drinking ales, lagers, and stouts to name a few.  Oh, you thought with my background I would be invading and occupying countries, that comes later -but keep it on the DL.

Let the CX experiment begin. I highly encourage you to heckle at a race or at a practice, it is very cathartic experience and much appreciated.  Please, and I mean please be creative with your hurled insults, the crazier the better.  Imagination is a wonderful thing, use it. Keep the swears to a minimum when there are Clergy or children present. 

New Season

It has gone so fast, yet seems like forever.  The ProTour offseason is over.  The ProTour teams are amassing at the bottom of the globe for the Tour Down Under.  This weekend will kick off with a pleminary Crit and then the big race will start on Tuesday.  I don't know about you guys, but I'm ready to start watching some racing again.  I've enjoyed getting to see some sporadic CX racing on the interweb, but it is just not the same as watching the roadies battle it out.

I can't wait to see the fight that is going to take place between the Manxman and the German Gorilla, former teammates that never liked each other now get a chance to race head-to-head.  There are going to be some awesome sprint stages with Cav, Greipel, Tyler, Thor, and Tom all going at it.  Little Robbie Mc is racing on The 'Shack, and with Thor and Tyler sharing the sprinter position it is going to lead to some interesting finales.  Stay tuned...it's gonna be good. 

The Classics are just around the corner.  Hardman time: le rouleur in action center stage.  Ah the Classics, bring on the weather, the cobbles, the mud, the Belgians, and the frites.  Pass the mayonnaise, please.  Danke.

The World Champs of CX are coming up this Jan 30th, so if it is the only CX race you watch all year at least watch this one.  It will be a great race.


Versus Schedule  *tentative* all times Eastern*


Santos Tour Down Under: January 16 & 18-23
January 16 @ 5pm- Cancer Council Classic Criterium Race
January 17 @ 6pm- Interview with Lance Armstrong
January 18-22 @ 6pm
January 23 @ 5pm

Check out this article on the Cyclingnews.  It has a breakdown of the team's new kits.  I found their reviews pretty funny, I'm not sure if they were trying to be funny or not???

OK State CX Champs

If you are looking for the box score or the "race report" you came to the wrong place. I went to Chandler Park yesterday to heckle my teammates and hand-up some water bottles. Oh, and watch some CX racing. I pilfered these pictures from one of Seth Likens' pages on Facebook. Have you heard of him? Well if you haven't here is some of his work. Hate to say work, it is truly art. I am a little biased, he is on our team, and he has some really good pictures of the artist formerly known as Glenn Duh. You know the camera adds 10lbs, in my case that is a good thing. Heck yeah, it makes me look pretty good, well have to say Seth makes me look good on the bike.

Enough about me. What a race yesterday. First of all -Cold, would not be a CX race without some sort of crazy weather. Daniel raced the 123's and had some HR issues and retired early, no biggie he still had the Single Speed race coming up. Marty and Kevin raced the Cat 4 race. The Doctor was in the house, and made pain look good. Dude's got more style than any single human can handle, good thing he has a PHD. Cory was the lone wolf pack of one for the ladies of Team Tom's. Brown Bear lined up with an out-gunned junior field. "can't bring a knife to a gunfight"

At the time of press...I don't know the results of my people, Marty and Kevin finished in the top 15, Cory was 3rd or 4th????? Brown Bear came home with a new jersey. A State Champion's jersey.

 

All Photos without Seth Likens permission